Stealth

Amongst those building, traveling in, or living full-time in camper vans, there is the notion of stealth: disguising the fact that the vehicle in question is a portable domicile, and making it appear as just another commercial or passenger van. There are a couple of reasons for this. Some folk worry that if and when they’re parked for the night—but not in a recognized campground—an obvious camper-van will attract attention from the authorities. They don’t want to be roused at 3:47 in the morning and told they can’t park there overnight. Others are concerned about visits from ne’er-do-wells. They figure that if a van looks like it might contain valuable goodies—cameras, electronics, maybe even cash—that it will be a target too tempting to pass up. We worried about this a little in Central America, and while we weren’t sleeping in the van, we tried to park it in well-traveled areas, while concealing anything that looked valuable.

The techniques for stealth range from the obvious to the subtle. A large roof-rack, holding a big utility box, an air conditioner, angled solar panels, and a ladder up the side is pretty much a give-away. Louvered side panels, providing ventilation for refrigerators, heaters, and hot-water heaters are also clues. Provisions for utility connections, electricity, water, and sewage, can tip off the observant. Big aftermarket wheels and tires are often indicators. Any of these items, though desired, may be passed by in the interests of keeping a low profile. On the Ford Transit Forum, at least one contributor has stated that while they’d really like to have a big awning attached to the side of their van, the perceived need for stealth prevents them from installing one.

This topic provokes a large body of reactions on the forum site. Most commenters seem to think that some degree of stealth is desirable. But they vary widely on the appropriate degree. And everybody has great ideas about how to achieve it. Just ask ‘em. There are plenty of stories about when more stealth would (or might) have helped. Stories involving both the local authorities and the local bad guys, wherever that locale may be. But it’s all anecdotal; nobody has any hard information about the efficacy of any particular measure. Not too surprising, as the great majority of people in this group have but a single data point, their own van. OK, some of the veterans have built two or three (or more), but that’s still nowhere near a meaningful sample size.

And yeah, I get it, nobody is about to do a large-scale, rigorous, double-blind study on the effects of stealth design in camper vans. Still, it’s frustrating to try and get any meaningful information on the topic.

While most stealth efforts involve reducing the attention the van receives, there are also those that attempt misdirection. Commercial plates will often help, if only subtly. A roof-rack populated with paint-spattered ladders, and paint drips down the doors and walls would also be effective (I presume), but I haven’t seen a camper that tried it. As far as I know. One idea that keeps coming up in various incarnations is lettering. Simply labeling the van as part of a commercial enterprise could go a long way to concealing its actual purpose.

A vehicle used in commerce, with a gross vehicle weight (GVWR) of more than 10,000 pounds is required (I think) to be registered with the US Department of Transportation, and display its registration number prominently. I’ve seen trucks that take the preventive measure of sporting a label like:

That certainly looks official, and suggests a commercial vehicle, even if most folk don’t quite understand its significance. But why stop there? Why not put up a sign on the driver’s and passenger’s doors, proclaiming this van to be working for a living, and on duty right now. Of course, similar rules apply, in that we don’t want the name to suggest that there are valuable supplies or equipment inside. We’ve come up with some possibilities: Midtown Garden Supply, Interstate Medical Waste Disposal, Electrodyne Corporation, VelSik Appliance Repair, and so on.

Maybe something simpler.

That’ll stop ‘em for sure.